Being a sibling can be complicated and challenging. Many siblings grow up not knowing there are other people out there with similar experiences, but it can really help to know that you’re not alone. In this section, adult siblings share their stories of life with their disabled brother or sister.
I sat down to write about my sibling strengths and this is what came out. I began thinking about my experiences growing up, and realised a lot of the cringier or more painful memories came from the ignorance of others. So my sibling strengths are being patient when I need to be, assertive if I … Continued
A sibling relationship is one of the most unique familial relationships out there. It usually outlives any other kind of familial relationship, meaning the impact it can have in shaping an individual’s life can be huge. When you add disability to this, the relationship becomes even more formative, for both parties. I grew up with … Continued
Read the stories of eight adult siblings as they reflect on their experiences of secondary school. We asked them what helped them as a child, what didn’t, and what support they would want for young siblings today. The responses are powerful. “I told my teacher that my sister has cerebral palsy and he immediately recognised … Continued
Boundary setting can be challenging for adult siblings as often many of us have grown up feeling that we have to be the ‘easy child’, or the one who is supposed to make things better for our disabled brother/sister and families. Many of us feel that we grew up being accustomed to putting our needs … Continued
Once I had a sister. Her name was Alison and she was twenty-one months younger than me, the middle child of our parents. We shared the same straight brown hair and green eyes, different from our younger brother with his blue eyes and blonde hair. Alison and I were born uneventfully at home. In the … Continued
Growing up with a sibling with a disability had its fair share of challenging times but also times that I cherish to this day. I can recall making many trips to London from Yorkshire with my dad and sister to visit my brother and mum at Great Ormond Street Hospital. Although I was very young … Continued
My employer was supportive when I told them I was a carer and, given that my team had all been working remotely from home anyway due to the pandemic, there were no work issues with me working from my mum’s house. I was able to flex my working hours to suit me, so that I … Continued
“A sweet tale of sibling love, told without sentimentality” Summer BrotherBy Jaap Robben, translated from the Dutch by David Doherty (2021); World EditionsReview by Pam Foley, adult sibling. Teenager Brian comes from a dysfunctional family; his parents are divorced and he lives with his conniving father in a trailer home, located in a remote Dutch … Continued
My brother, Mark, has periventricular leukomalacia which is a lifelong disability caused by damage to his brain around the time of his birth. This has impacted him physically, cognitively and made him partially sighted. He has always lived in boarding schools or supported living due to the level of his needs, including challenging behaviour. Mark … Continued
My earliest memory of my brother is scooting up and down the children’s ward in a toy car at St James’ hospital in Leeds. Although I was almost 3 when he was born, I think I knew even then that he was poorly and somehow ‘different’ to other people’s siblings. Growing up with my brother … Continued
Would you like to help other siblings by sharing your own story? Please get in touch.