Being a sibling can be complicated and challenging. Many siblings grow up not knowing there are other people out there with similar experiences, but it can really help to know that you’re not alone. In this section, adult siblings share their stories of life with their disabled brother or sister.
I’m the only family member for my brother aged 52 with Asperger’s and my mother, aged 88, who has dementia. So, if I can’t see anything about my relationship with my brother as a positive, how do I, as a great believer in the life-changing effects of focusing on positives, find a positive in having … Continued
The (very) least I can do? It’s funny isn’t it. When you’re a kid. The bullying and harsh words that get thrown at you for being different. They really stick with you. The effects ringing round your brain decades later. You don’t need to be a sibling to know that. Just someone who stands out. … Continued
“The siblings of special needs children are quite special. Absolutely accepting and totally loving, from birth. Someone who is different mentally, and has a different way of seeing the world, is a wonderful trait. It’s a trait I wish there was another way of getting, but there isn’t. And it does involve a degree of … Continued
Sibling Truths Important: This is a personal account that may/may not be reflective of other people’s experiences. There are many times when having a sibling with a disability is hard; life-changingly, cripplingly hard. I feel we don’t speak about this enough. Social media is full of posts of parents celebrating their children’s disabilities, sharing moments … Continued
I met my husband through mutual friends. We were friends for years before getting together. We’ve been a couple for 19 years and married for 9. I honestly feel so blessed to have found him. My previous relationship was very toxic. My ex had had a very difficult life, he came from a broken home … Continued
I sat down to write about my sibling strengths and this is what came out. I began thinking about my experiences growing up, and realised a lot of the cringier or more painful memories came from the ignorance of others. So my sibling strengths are being patient when I need to be, assertive if I … Continued
A sibling relationship is one of the most unique familial relationships out there. It usually outlives any other kind of familial relationship, meaning the impact it can have in shaping an individual’s life can be huge. When you add disability to this, the relationship becomes even more formative, for both parties. I grew up with … Continued
Read the stories of eight adult siblings as they reflect on their experiences of secondary school. We asked them what helped them as a child, what didn’t, and what support they would want for young siblings today. The responses are powerful. “I told my teacher that my sister has cerebral palsy and he immediately recognised … Continued
Boundary setting can be challenging for adult siblings as often many of us have grown up feeling that we have to be the ‘easy child’, or the one who is supposed to make things better for our disabled brother/sister and families. Many of us feel that we grew up being accustomed to putting our needs … Continued
Once I had a sister. Her name was Alison and she was twenty-one months younger than me, the middle child of our parents. We shared the same straight brown hair and green eyes, different from our younger brother with his blue eyes and blonde hair. Alison and I were born uneventfully at home. In the … Continued
Would you like to help other siblings by sharing your own story? Please get in touch.